Every Instance of Pronouns in the United States Constitution
Posted 27 July 2022So, some seemingly notable dumbass posted to Twitter that there aren't pronouns in the constitution, so, inspired, here we go. Every single instance of pronouns in the US consitution.
The dumbass in question.
I guess I should note that I'm referencing a pocket constitution made by the Cato Institute for this. The Cato Institute is a right-leaning (some might say right-wing) think tank, so you can miss me with accusations of using some liberal source here. I'm also only going to use nominative and accusative pronouns, but you could make this even longer if you included possessive pronouns as well. And I'm not going to include instances of "it". So, I guess it's not every instance, but still. This gets my point across, ĉu ne?
The Preamble
The first word of the Constitution is literally a pronoun:
We the People of the United States...
Good job.
Article I, Section 3
Immediately after they shall be assembled in Consequence of the first Election, they shall be divided...
The Vice President...shall have no Vote, unless they be equally divided.
When sitting for that Purpose, they shall be on Oath or Affirmation.
Article I, Section 4
...such Meeting shall be on the first Monday in December, unless they shall by Law appoint a different Day.
Article I, Section 6
They shall in all Cases...
...they shall not be questioned in any other place.
Article I, Section 7
If he approve he shall sign it, but if not he shall return it...
...in like Manner as if he had signed it...
...before the Same shall take Effect, shall be approved by him, or being disapproved by him, shall be...
Article I, Section 9
And no Person holding any Office of Profit or Trust under them...
Article II, Section 1
He shall hold his Office...
And they shall make a List of all the Persons...which List they shall sign...
...during the Period for which he shall have been elected, and he shall not...
Before he enter on the Execution of his Office, he shall take the following Oath or Affirmation:— "I do solemnly swear (or affirm) that I will faithfully execute the Office of President of the United States..."
Article II, Section 2
...he may require the Opinion...
...and he shall have Power to grant Reprieves and Pardons...
He shall have Power...to make Treaties...
...and he shall nominate, and...shall appoint Ambassadors...
...as they think proper, in the President alone...Article II, Section 3
He shall frmo time to time give to Congress...
...as he shall judge necessary and expedient; he may, on extraordinary Occasions...
...he may adjourn them from time to time as he shall think proper; he shall receive ambassadors...; he shall take Care that Laws...
Article III, Section 3
Treason against the United States, shall consist only in levying War against them...
Article IV, Section 4
...shall protect each of them against Invasion...
Conclusion
Ya know, I'm half tempted to copy-paste in a copy of the Constitution and highlight every pronoun, but I think this get this point across. To say that there are no pronouns in the Constitution is a statement so ignorant of what pronouns actually are that it leaves me wondering whether you passed the second grade. Like, seriously. This is elementary school level stuff. How do you get this so fucking wrong?!
Anywho, next time you hear some dumbass say something this fucking ignorant, feel free to link them to this, so that they may learn of their folly and feel suitably ashamed.
Oh, and do feel free to let me know if I missed any! That pocket constitution may be a decently authoritative reference, but it's difficult to use as a reference for something like this.
Keywords: Language